Midweek Musing- 9/26/24

I came across what is supposedly a real entry from the personal journal of a small-town doctor in the1930s. I found it both interesting and thought provoking.

In this diary the physician notes that on one dark stormy night with a howling wind and bone chilling rain he received a call routed from the phone company switchboard to his home phone. The call was from a frantic man who said his wife needed urgent medical care. This family lived several miles outside of town, while the doctor lived above his office near the center of the city.

The doctor shared in his journal that he first calmed the man down and said he would be glad to come at once. But then added his car was not in service but was at the garage being repaired by the local mechanic; thus he asked the frantic man to come and pick him up. He said that he would be waiting at the door of his office ready to jump in the car the moment he arrived.

The caller was obviously annoyed and in an angry voice sputtered, “What, you expect me to come get you in this weather?”

We chuckle a bit at the story but there is some truth we can discover here if we are honest with ourselves.

You see, I don’t know about you, but I often pray and listen and make lists of pros/cons and talk with others and do those sorts of practices intended to help me discern what God might want me to do regarding a decision I need to make. But then when I believe I know what I should do, I balk because it might mean having to drive though a storm. Sometimes I even go back to the drawing board and start the entire discernment process over, hoping I will get a different outcome, as if somehow, I could change God’s mind.

When asked in things like Bible studies I quickly tell folks that I seek to know God’s will and I honestly do. However, discernment is only part of the process. The next part is much more difficult—follow through with action on that which I faithfully believe I have discerned.

Now I’m not alone in this struggle; recall that the apostle Paul in his letter to the church at Rome wrote these words:

15 I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do. 16 And if I do what I do not want to do, I agree that the law is good. 17 As it is, it is no longer I myself who do it, but it is sin living in me. 18 For I know that good itself does not dwell in me, that is, in my sinful nature.[a] For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out.19 For I do not do the good I want to do, but the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing. 20 Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it.    Romans 7:15-20 New International Version

Of course, we know Paul was able to walk the path God called him to far more than he failed to do so. Perhaps in those moments where he struggled, he recalled the promises of God found in the Hebrew Scriptures. Promises that remind us even in the valley of the shadow of death that God is with us.

Ginny Owens is a singer, writer, and speaker who recently graduated from seminary in New York. I met her years ago when she preformed a concert early in her career at First Presbyterian Church Marietta. She was clearly an amazing talent.

As a side note when I arrived at the concert, I ran into my friend Rev. Larry who at the time worked for Thornwell Home for Children, which is a ministry of the Presbyterian Church. Thornwell is located directly across from Presbyterian College in Clinton, SC where Laura and I went to school. I actually went to church and volunteered at Thornwell during my four years at PC. When I ran into Larry, I discovered the concert headliner Ginny was his daughter. #small world

Anyway, one other thing about Ginny—she is blind and has been so since the age of three. Yet Ginny works to remain faithful despite her blindness. She seeks to let God speak to others even through her physical struggles.

One of her first and for me most powerful songs is entitled “If you want me to.”

I will share the lyrics and link to the music below; however, the opening lines are so powerful and speak to the way I want to live my life.

The pathway is broken

And the signs are unclear

And I don't know the reason why you brought me here

But just because you love me, the way that you do

I'm gonna walk through the valley

If you want me to

Of course, the good news is even when I don’t do what I should, that love and grace that only God can provide holds on to me and forgives so that I might try again.

So, when we are called to walk through valleys and storms, may we know God is with us, but also may we know God is not only with us during those times when we are faithful but even when we do those things we should not do.

Thanks be to God. In the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit. Alleluia Amen.

“If You Want Me To” by Ginny Owens

The pathway is broken

And the signs are unclear

And I don't know the reason why you brought me here

But just because you love me, the way that you do

I'm gonna walk through the valley

If you want me to

'Cause I'm not who I was

When I took my first step

And I'm clinging to the promise 

You're not through with me yet

So, if all of these trials bring me closer to you

Then I will go through the fire

If you want me to

It may not be the way I would have chosen

When you lead me through a world that's not my home

But, you never said it would be easy

You only said I'd never go alone, yeah oh oh

So, when the whole world turns against me

And I'm all by myself

And I can't hear you answer, my cries for help

I'll remember the suffering

Your love put you through

And I will go through the valley

If you want me to

Songwriters: Kyle David Matthews / Virginia Leigh Owens